Have you ever heard of “love languages”? Did you know that there are FIVE of them?
Love languages are the ways of expressing and receiving love in your relationship. And I’m not just talking about romantic relationships. Each of us has our own “love language” that we prefer to receive and show.
Now, you might be thinking that my partner is fine with the love I give him/her or knowing my partner’s “love language” won’t do any good.
But this is far from the truth! Knowing this information can make for a better relational dynamic no matter who is involved. And here are few reasons why:
- You can automatically satisfy your partner’s emotional needs in this way which helps them feel loved and appreciated. When your partner’s needs are fulfilled, they feel more safe and secure in the relationship.
- Speaking to your partner’s love language can minimize misunderstandings and conflicts because it tells your partner that you are in tuned to their experiences, prevents them from feeling disregarded.
- Knowing your partner’s love language will you better support them when they are having a bad day. You will know exactly what to do to put a smile on their face and uplift their mood.
Like we said earlier, your partner has a preferred way of receiving love and it’s important for you to know your partner’s love language so you can “speak” it. So, let’s briefly go through each one.
- Words of Affirmation: This language is expressed with words. Example: Verbal compliments or statements like “I love your….” or “Thank you for always….”
- Acts of Service: This language is expressed by doing things for your partner that you know they would like. Example: Cooking a meal, doing the dishes, picking up the kids, pouring a cup of coffee for them
- Receiving Gifts: This language is expressed through gifting your partner meaningful or thoughtful gifts. Example: Buying their favorite ice cream or name brand tennis shoes.
- Quality Time: This language is expressed through providing your undivided time with your partner. So put your phones away and any other distractions! Example: Go on a date, read a book together, take a walk together
- Physical Touch: This language is expressed through connection, closeness, and of course physical touch. Example: Hugging, kissing, holding hands.
Now, don’t worry if you don’t know your partner’s love language. It is common for couples to not know their partner’s love language without directly asking or without your partner expressing it. I’ve provided a few ways to do so below.
- Have your partner take the love language quiz.
- Simply ask your partner “What can I do to make sure you feel loved?” or “How do you feel loved?”
- Look at how your partner expresses their love to you. What and how your partner expresses love is often how they want it to be reciprocated.
Now you know why it’s important to know your partner’s love language. By doing so, it will help create a stronger bond in your relationship, and guess what… it’s never too late to start learning!
Interesting in trying out couples counseling? We offer personalized online counseling and therapy services. Call (925) 577-4732 today for a free consultation!
Honor Your Emotions is a therapy practice in Dublin, CA serving the East Bay Area including Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore and Danville.
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