The holidays can be tough for many people and for many reasons.
- Perhaps you’ve lost a loved one during this season
- Had a break-up
- It’s the anniversary of some gut-wrenching life event
- Do your family gatherings typically turn for the worst?
- Dreading those unwanted questions by nosey loved-ones?
I get it.
The first thing you should know is you are not alone. Feeling isolated and like “you are the only one” is the first thing you’ve got to flush down the toilet. It is a lie. You are not alone. Even if you feel lonely during this time be reminded that many people share your same sadness, worries, and concerns during this time of year.
Therapy isn’t about fixing things overnight. I wish there was a one-stop remedy for all of life’s woes. But what we can offer is a step to help you peel back the layers of your thoughts and emotions. Eventually bringing you to a more grounded, peace-filled, and joy-filled life.
For example. Let’s say you are in a high rise building. You are on floor 24, the highest floor in the building. At that level, you get off the elevator and enter a dark depressing room. You’re the only one there and the silence is deafening because your negative inner thoughts are so loud. Floor 24 is not a good place. What therapy can do is be that elevator operator helping you get off of floor 24 and aid you in moving down floor-by-floor. Moving through your thoughts and emotions. Helping you get back to the ground floor, a rooted place of inner peace and harmony.
So let’s move down a floor, shall we?
This time of year can be tough for a lot of people. You are not alone.
You must remember to come down the elevator and not go up. Don’t agitate or suppress your emotions during this time. Don’t drown yourself in substance abuse, lash out at others, or isolate yourself. Challenge yourself to honor your emotions and manage the mind.
How does one both honor their emotions and manage the mind? Glad you asked.
Take these steps:
- Acknowledge your heart and feelings (and your triggers)
- Map out a game plan (yes writing things down)
- Reflect on the season
1). What emotions are coming up for you?
- Sadness, grief, anxiety, anger? Identify your feelings.
- Peel back beyond your emotions to discover what event or memory is triggering your emotions?
- Loss of a loved one, the anniversary of a divorce, a sickness? Identify it and write it down.
2). Plan accordingly
- You may have to make plans for the holidays if isolation takes you up the elevator.
- You may need a time limit to give yourself for interactions with loved ones.
- You may need to limit your drinking or skip it all together during this time.
If you can’t make plans, make calls, send emails, reach out to a church community, sign-up to pass out food to in-need communities, or volunteer at an animal shelter.
After you’ve acknowledged your triggers and honored your emotions map out a game plan to help you through this time.
You can do it.
3). Reflect on the season – Journaling
- Measure how you handled this season.
- Did you cry or get upset during this time?
- How long did those emotions linger?
- Where you able to move through your emotions (down the elevator)?
If you are already working with a professional take these notes to them. If you need to work with someone make that call. We here at Honor Your Emotions are ready to work with you.
You can make it through this season. If you need help in processing your emotions and putting a game plan together give us a call at (925) 577-4732.
Wishing you a peace-filled holiday,
-Tangia
Honor Your Emotions is a therapy practice in Dublin, CA serving the East Bay Area including Pleasanton, San Ramon, Livermore and Danville.
Call (925) 577-4732 today for a free consultation!
